Whenever you're thinking about becoming a mom or especially during the pregnancy stage, everyone tells you what you have to look forward to. For example, the "better get all the sleep you can now because you won't sleep good again until the child is grown up and out of the house" or "better save all the money you can now because having children is expensive." But no one ever said to me "better stash up on some courage now because when you have children you're going to be a worried mess"!Now, don't get me wrong, I have always had a tendency to worry. But since becoming a mom I have developed completely new fears, one of those being thunderstorms. It drives my husband insane, but at the first crack of thunder and bolt of lightning I completely tense up and surf through all local channels to see if there is a severe thunderstorm warning, or even worse - a tornado watch or warning! It doesn't matter if it's while we're sitting on the couch in the evening or in the middle of the night when I'm supposed to be sleeping (which is the case majority of the time).
The most annoying I get with this fear is in the middle of the night. If I wake up to a storm I immediately begin the local channel surfing. If I’m scared enough and need the volume up loud or feel like I’m starting to bother anyone I’ll go out to the living room (carrying the flashlight I keep next to the bed in case power goes out) to do this. Often, if it is storming that bad, the tv usually gets knocked out and then I steal my husband’s handy dandy Iphone and literally track storms from his phone. One night I fell asleep with his phone next to me just in case I needed to check on the weather again. The next morning he was getting ready to leave for work and asked where his phone was. I handed him his phone and said “Your phone is over here. I was using it to track storms.” He just laughed and couldn’t believe I had been up tracking storms during the night. One time I even got so scared that I grabbed my son and went to our bathroom and held him until the storm calmed down, not because he was scared, but because I was scared and wanted to make sure he was safe.
Granted I have moved to a new place where storms seem louder and more prone to tornadoes, I can’t remember a time in my life when I ever felt so scared of storms. When in college, if I heard there was going to be a severe thunderstorm I just thought it was a great excuse to wear my cool rain boots and jacket so I don’t get too wet, not I better prepare for a tornado.
I guess it’s just one of the signs of the amazing love you have for your child as a mom. You instinctively feel the need to be a protector for your family “come rain or come shine.” This has proven to be an area where my husband balances me out well. He is always the one reassuring me that everything will be ok and there's no need in worrying about what's to come. There was actually a tornado warning earlier this evening in our area, and although I was nervous, I felt a lot calmer than usual. Of course, I kept a close eye on the weather making sure our specific location was ok and in the clear, but I didn't pace the floor or stalk weather.com. Just tried to take a deep breath and go on. Hopefully, my fear will soon pass into simple cautiousness, but with a growing boy, I'm sure there are plenty more fears to come!
Posts
